According to this expert, love, play, work, and worship all come together to form happiness. This is a philosophy adopted by the Pankey Institute. But reading about it and actually practicing it can be two different things. Here is Part II of tips to get you started on the road to true happiness. Read Part I here.
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What is happiness? Happiness in the practice of dentistry lies not so much in material compensation or professional recognition, but in the spiritual regard of serving patients well. Financial regard and the esteem of others come as a natural outgrowth of these services.
Happiness means something different to everyone. It’s based on individual objectives, temperament, and circumstances. But it’s important to everyone that their basic needs are met. It is an important part of the Pankey Philosophy to create balance in life for the sake of physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional health.
The Cabot Cross, developed by Dr. Richard Cabot and adopted by Dr. LD Pankey in his teachings at the Pankey Institute, can help define what is and is not balanced in a person’s life. The first article covered work and play, and this article covers love and worship.
Love
Love has many different meanings. Love in its most basic and powerful form means accepting and caring for others unconditionally, without expectation of reward or reciprocation. The Greeks called it “agape,” or selfless love, encompassing the divinity of all people and what they have to offer the world. The Greeks called romantic love “eros” and defined a third type of love, “phila,” as brotherly love.
Richard Alpert, a former Harvard psychology professor who spent 15 years studying Eastern religious thoughts, related how upset his father became when he gave money to strangers. Dr. Alpert pointed out that his father had given money to his Uncle Henry when he needed it. “But that was Uncle Henry,” his father protested. “To me, everyone is Uncle Henry,” Alpert said. Not that people should give everything they own, but an attitude of giving has positive effects on both the giver and receivers. It would be a different world if we treated other people as our brothers and sisters.
The love of family members and close friends is an important part of life. A study conducted at the University of California at Berkeley concluded that people with family or a close network of friends tend to stay healthier and live longer than those lacking a social network (greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/). Furthermore, the loss of a loved one has been linked to a breakdown of the immunological system and diseases. According to Dr. Larry Dosset of the Dallas Diagnosis Biofeedback Laboratory, cancer is the most common cause of death among widows and widowers. Close personal relationships are not automatic, they need cultivation, time, and energy spent listening, caring, and sharing.
Although we think of love for a husband or wife as focusing on that person, relationships that are most enduring involve relating to the world or to a purpose beyond ourselves. It has been said that love consists not of looking one another in the eyes, but of looking outwardly in the same direction. Sometimes, love can be renewed and extended by sharing a similar vision.
Is your work life dominating your time and interfering in your relationships with your spouse, children, family, and friends? Are you a good father, husband, and son? Are you a good mother, wife, and daughter? Are you a good friend, employer, and employee? These relationships are valuable and irreplaceable. If this part of your life is out of balance, make it your goal to revitalize these important relationships.
Worship
Worship, whether seen as formal prayer, meditation, solitude, or any other form, provides a break in the perpetual motion of daily existence. “Wonder brings ordinary life to a standstill,” Richard Cabot said. Similarly, pausing to reflect, meditate, or pray can provide perspective and a sense of peace. Momentarily stopping the wheels of life in this way can often lead to profound insight. If you’re lost in the woods, climb the highest tree.
In recent years, meditation has been recommended by physicians and psychologists as a way to relax and relieve stress. But it can do more than that. It can quiet the inner mind and soul, resulting in a sense of clarity and direction. Answers to questions might become more clear. Abraham Lincoln used prayer for guidance during the darkest days of the Civil War. He said, “I am not trying to find out whether God is on our side, but whether we are on His.”
Worship is a very personal thing. For some it means direct communication with God or a god-like image. For others it means experiencing the connections among all living things. Regardless of the words used, worship adds a dimension of purpose to our actions. It reflects love, a broader view of self-interest, and an ability to believe in something greater than ourselves, which is the highest essence of being human.
Worship does not always take the form of organized religion. Love, respect, and appreciation of life need not be associated with any particular belief system. Something as pure and simple as a breathtaking scene illuminated by sunshine is a form of worship, providing an inner sense of gratitude and wonder. Worship or faith also helps provide strength during disaster or tragedy. Faith and hope provide a strong foundation for stability and purpose for life.
Is worship a part of your life? Do you pause in your daily activities to reflect and feel some inner peace? When you feel tense or upset, can you climb the highest tree and gain perspective? Can you appreciate the positive aspects of all situations?
Balancing your life
It’s unrealistic to expect to change your entire life in one day or even one year. But by systematically applying the Pankey Philosophy in ways that suit your temperament and circumstances, you’ll add renewed purpose to your work and life. If you start living the Pankey Philosophy, you will experience success on a level you might never have imagined. It requires commitment to begin and discipline to carry through. If you take time on a regular basis to honestly look at yourself from the standpoint of your work life, playtime, love life, and inner worship, you will begin to balance yourself in order to achieve happiness.
